It wasn't awkward, because I didn't make it awkward; I uncrossed my perpetually crossed arms and talked comfortably with him for the rest of the ride.And—thank you, fate—when we happened to get off at the same stop, he asked for my number. I'd hypothesize that 80% of missed connections are missed because someone was just relying on catching the other person's eye.' Anything that's really easy to start a conversation is how you do it." Body language matters."When you [talk to him], you want to do it with the right energy: You want to be smiling and looking into his eyes in a soft way; you just want to make yourself really approachable and friendly," says Steinberg."You want to be focusing on his positives, and enjoying yourself and him. "Definitely smile—you just really want to give him the message that you're interested, available, and would like to get to know him a little bit."Subtlety is power, and learn how to take a hint."My advice for men is different than my advice for women.
Hold someone’s gaze for four seconds, look away, and then look back.When you do that, you'll naturally have a more open, friendly body language. Women have a lot more flexibility, because men in general aren't really afraid of us," Steinberg says.Some of my clients who are very uncomfortable talking to men will naturally cross their arms; turn away. "Smiling, eye contact…you want to respect his boundaries.Meanwhile, thanks to my status as a supremely awkward individual, my "flirting" reads more like uncomfortable gawking than coquettish glancing."You have to bump it up and start a conversation," NYC "dateologist" Tracey Steinberg informed me when I explained that I actually couldn't find love in a hopeless place."So, ," I said pseudo-casually, "If, say, one of our readers is shy, what advice would you have?
""If you want to meet someone, you don't have the luxury of being shy," she responded. When I called on Steinberg, I was hoping that she would give me her secrets to expert eye-flirting and I'd be batting my eyelashes to a date in no time.
It was rather flattering that he thought of me in a more romantic way.